Fear of Blank Pages and My New Journal

Breaking in a new journal is hard...all those blank pages staring back at you, daring you to do something, and your inner critic saying "don't mess it up! Be brilliant! No smears, nothing sloppy, nothing trite!"

To overcome the dreaded blank journal page, I made my previous journal with colored cardstock, which helped a little. For my latest journal, I went a step further, using some delicious commercial scrapbooking paper and some painted deli paper instead of blank pages.



Randomly painted colorful deli paper was used for the journal pages.
Two thin sheets of painted deli paper were put back to back and glued
together with matte medium to form each page.

Commercial printed paper and painted deli paper covered the
folder cardboard, and signatures of colorful paper were sewn in
to each fold.

For the journal cover, heavy cardboard was covered with my
own fabric, which I designed and was printed on cotton by Spoonflower.

 

Pieces of commercial scrapbook paper was cut to size for
some of the journal pages.

The unfinished journal, with both commercial paper and
painted deli paper.The tied signature pages are visible.

Once the journal was done, I still stared at the pages and thought "oh, this is too pretty to mess up!" But I pressed ahead and worked on the page anyway.

First completed  page of the new journal

I used a beautiful photo of a poppy--one of my favorite flowers--that was torn from a Spring fashion catalogue. It went nicely with the pink painted deli paper background. In my stash, I found a little bottle of Lumiere acrylic paint, so I used it with some stencils to add texture.

Then I added words that popped into my head. I am always thinking about art--designing some new project in my head, or doodling, or scribbling down ideas or taking a photo of something that inspires me, so I wrote those thoughts.

Some of the pink painted deli paper shows through, which is much more interesting than the standard white page.

After the first journal page was done, I was on a roll, so I also finished part of a shared "hands" project. Originally we were going to start painting or drawing on a hand shape, then mail it around and each person would add a little bit...kind of like a chain letter. However, one of the participants decided to make a book, so I took her blank hand shape, and used it like a little journal page, applying stamps, stencils and words randomly to the front and back.

Palm of hand, with Julie Fei-Fan Balzer stamp and
Artistcellar stencils

Front of hand, with stamps, stencils, paint and markers.

Making a New Journal With Deli Paper and Scraps

 This is the cover of the new accordion journal that I just finished making. The cover is made from recycled cardboard and painted deli paper. The Kurt Vonnegut quote on the bottom expresses the reason I feel compelled to do mixed media work in my journal...it lets the crazy energy out that might otherwise be trapped inside me and make me anxious, panicky and physically sick.

Last summer's class with Kelly Kilmer at the Ink Pad got me addicted to journaling and to making my own journals. I have beautiful journals that I have purchased or received as gifts that are too precious to use. I am always afraid of messing them up, and I also have my inner critic telling me that only fabulous work is worthy of the pages.

With a journal made from leftover cardboard and junk art that is too good to throw away but not good enough to hang on the wall, the voice of the inner critic is silenced. It also becomes very personal and really belongs to you.

Following the directions that Kelly gave to class participants, I made my third accordion journal recently. I love every aspect of the journal making...I love sewing, so that skill comes into play with sewing the signatures together. I love construction and cutting, so measuring and cutting the cardboard (from the backs of used-up legal pads) is right up my alley.

I rummaged through my pieces of painted deli paper for the cover, and used reject paintings for the accordion sections. The signatures were made with assorted colored cardstock I had on hand. I ran out of waxed linen to stitch it with, and couldn't find my big blunt needle with a huge eye, so I doubled dental floss and used an embroidery needle.

Here's how it came together:

I used two similar pieces of painted deli paper
and connected them using matte medium

I glued the cut cardboard pieces to the deli paper with
matte medium, then wrapped them around the edges.

I made signatures of folded cardstock (in a variety of colors) then stitched them to
a long, accordion-folded piece of hot pink paper, recycled from a poster



Here is the book opened and folded after the pieces were stitched

I didn't like the hot pink, so I covered it with reject mixed media paintings and
painted deli paper with printmaking experiments.

interior view of book

Another interior view of a deli paper covered accordion section

This is the old cover. The striped part is the back.
(silly me, I had it upside down when I took the photo!)
The front sectionwas lumpy and bumpy because I did not use enough matte medium
when I covered the cardboard with the painted deli paper. I tried and failed
twice to fix it, without success, so I just added a smaller piece of
another painted deli paper for the final cover.

This is the final journal, front and back, with the new cover. I can't wait to use it!